1862 was a horrible year for the Lincolns.
The Bludgeon Blow
The Sixteenth President
When he was elected President in 1860, Abraham Lincoln knew that the challenges ahead, as he put it, were “greater even than those of George Washington.” Problems abounded from the start, with seven states already seceded from the Union, and Fort Sumter already under siege when he took his oath of office on March 4, 1861.
First Lady Mary Lincoln
Mary Lincoln, the new FLOTUS, born and raised as a Kentucky belle, was well educated, cultured and a little snooty, believing herself well suited to leading the Washington social scene. But even before they entered the White House, Mrs. Lincoln was out-snooted by a group of Congressional wives who insinuated (at least to her) that she was “western” which they equated with low taste and sophistication. Then, of course, there were those who erroneously accused her of having southern sympathies.
Both Lincolns were navigating through very rough waters. Both muddled through their first year, with few triumphs and many headaches. But one thing they adamantly believed, was that the White House should still function as the strong executive nexus, both politically and socially.
Willie Lincoln died at only eleven.
Thus, in early February 1862, with the Civil war slogging away and casualties far more than anyone imagined, the Lincolns decided to host a gala affair. But coincidental to their plans, their sons Willie (11) and Tad (8) had taken ill with the usual childhood flus and fevers. The doctor assured the worried parents that the boys would recover. Tad did, but Willie developed typhoid fever and two weeks later, he died.
The bereaved Lincolns, particularly the emotionally fragile First Lady, never fully recovered.
Phineas T. Barnum: Showman
P.T. Barnum (1810-91), about the same age as Lincoln, was already a household word by the time Lincoln married in 1842.
Phineas T. Barnum, one of the great showmen of his time.
Early in his life, he discovered his unique genius for razzle-dazzle and showmanship, along with a world filled with “curiosities” that could be hyped into appearing even more curious. He was a whopping success, and owned a New York museum on Broadway that drew a half-million visitors.
Barnum and “General Tom Thumb” – one of his biggest attractions.
One of those curiosities was Charles Stratton (1838-83), a 3’8” little fellow, smart, personable, and in tune with Barnum’s philosophy of moneymaking. The impresario and star joined forces, and drawing upon an old English fairy tale called Tom Thumb, Barnum renamed his great attraction “General” Tom Thumb. The name-and-rank stuck and he was a hit from the start.
Possibly to keep the hype hyped, Barnum scoured the country, and discovered Lavinia Warren, a few years younger than “the General,” and about the same height. Nature took its course, and they fell in love.
General Tom Thumb and his bride Lavinia Warren.
By 1863, both were of marriageable age, and the pot-of-gold opportunities of a wedding between Barnum stars was much too good to ignore. This time, sheer publicity and hype were not necessary. The affections were real. Nevertheless, Barnum pulled out all the stops as well as his wallet.
An elaborate wedding was held in New York’s Grace Episcopal Church, and it is said that more than 2000 guests were invited. Barnum and Co. planned to go to Washington as part of a three-year honeymoon-cum-ballyhoo.
The Lincoln Connection
P.T. Barnum knew his business better than anyone, and could not resist the juxtaposition of miniature bride and groom and President Abraham Lincoln – all 6’4” of him. He contacted the President, whose sense of humor and good nature was already legendary. The POTUS was amenable to hosting a small post-wedding gathering. Nine-year-old Tad would certainly enjoy it, and it might be a pleasant respite for still grieving Mary Lincoln.
Mrs. Lincoln was not only willing to attend, but even selected a lovely fire screen to give to the newlyweds. It is also said that she shed her black mourning clothing that night and wore a pink silk gown for the occasion. Perhaps she did not wish to throw a pall on the happy couple.
The Problem With Robert
Robert Lincoln, the oldest Lincoln offspring, was not blessed with a sense of humor.
Robert Lincoln, the President’s oldest son, was nineteen in 1863, home on break from his studies at Harvard, and staying at the White House with his family.
Robert was (and always would be) a serious fellow of great reserve, who inherited little of either parents’ humorous inclinations. Perhaps, at nearly twenty and at Harvard, he may have been just a bit overimpressed by his sense of personal dignity.
Robert believed that this level of crass showmanship was far below the President and First Lady’s august position. He is generally quoted as saying, “No, Mother, I do not propose to assist in entertaining Tom Thumb. My notions, perhaps, are somewhat different than yours.” The President’s eldest son remained in his room.
The Reception
Tad Lincoln had a grand time!
Robert or no Robert, the President was delighted to play host, and treated the event with great courtliness. One attendee remarked on how graciously he bent down to shake hands with the “General,” and to lift the new Mrs. Stratton’s tiny hand to kiss it.
The guest list for this unusual event at the White House was impressive. Along with the family (sans Robert) and staff members, Treasury Secretary Salmon P. Chase and Secretary of the Navy Gideon Welles were in attendance. So was General Benjamin Butler (never known to have much humor either).
Mrs. Lincoln enjoyed herself, perhaps having that brief respite from melancholy that her husband hoped for. Lincoln enjoyed it. And Tad had a grand time!
And of course, Barnum reaped the benefit!
Sources:
Conroy,James B. – Lincoln’s White House: The People’s House in Wartime – Rowman and Littlefield, 2016
Donald, David Herbert – Lincoln – Simon and Schuster – 1996
https://www.saturdayeveningpost.com/2013/02/general-tom-thumb-marries-lavinia-warren/
https://www.historynet.com/abraham-lincoln-greets-general-mrs-tom-thumb.htm
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